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Return
"Been a -- long time," Ray gasped. Burned, a little. Way too long.
"Yes," Fraser said. He had a frown of concentration on his face, like it took all his brainpower to figure out how to be in Ray again.
"It -- go easy, easy, Fraser, ow --"
Funny, it hadn't really hurt the first time. And that was after a break of ten years, not ten months.
But Fraser had been more careful then, so careful that Ray remembered trying to actually rush him -- C'mon, c'mon, Fraser, come on! Strange to have to tell him to slow down.
This was pretty much like he remembered it when he was young and stupid, drunk half the time and trying to do it with nothing but spit. Braced on the arm of that filthy green couch in Joe Fratti's parents' basement. Joe's worried breathless voice in his ear going, "You sure you even like this, Kowalski?" and him growling back through his teeth, "Yeah, yeah, fuckin' get on with it."
A couple seconds more and he'd be past the worst of the resistance so he could -- there, that had it. He breathed out hard as Fraser slid deep and just stayed there, pressed close, and he was heavy on Ray's chest, and Ray wrapped his arms around Fraser's shoulders and dragged him closer, because ten months was a hell of a long time with nobody to hug.
"I'm sorry, Ray," Fraser whispered against the side of his face.
" 's OK now," Ray said. "Just hard to get started again."
"No," and Fraser lifted his head to look Ray in the eye. "Not for that. You would have stayed. I understand that now. If I hadn't -- if I had trusted that you knew what you --"
Ray squeezed the back of Fraser's neck. "I know," he said. "You're an idiot. I know better than to listen to you, now."
Fraser closed his eyes. "Thank you," he said.
-end-
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August 14, 2004
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