This is a response to Cynara's challenge on Senad to write a PWP using as many archaic, polysyllabic, and "literary" terms as possible. She told me I should give the challenge a name, so if you don't like "Hifalutin" blame me, not her. One line stolen shamelessly from a dead white guy, thrown in for all former, current, someday, wannabe, or wouldabeen English majors. Cheers, gang. Any and all comments (good, bad, indifferent, or just horribly confused) welcome.
Myriad thanks to my beta reader for her fast and skilled work on this, and for suggesting a bunch of words I hadn't thought of (including the lovely subtitle). Gramercy, Zoe!
(Glossary is at the end of the story.) 

written March 24, 199


(or, Jolif Mestrier Amourous)

by Arduinna


"Beloved." Jim spake the word slowly, savoring its sound with his mouth as his eyen savored the callypygian sight before him.

Blair turned and smiled at him, eyen glistering with seraphic joy. "Mine Adonis?"

Jim, beguiled by such blandishment, gazed aporetic at his lover, whose smile deepened.

"Didst not know?" Blair asked. "Th'art the very apogee of tetris pulchritude."

"Nay, not I. 'Tis thou -- thou that art so eesome," Jim murmured, "so exoptable."

"So evancalous?" Blair asked winsomely.

"Oh, certes, evancalous."

"Prithee, then, show me so. I would have thy thewy arms about me, not hanging so useless at thy sides."

Jim stayed his response, aware that his beloved was as much an aficianado of tantalolagnia as he himself was. Tonight, he would be verecund.

His first reward came with the sparkle lit deep in the other's ultramarine eyen. "E'en so?" Blair breathed.

"E'en so, my love."

"Ne'er do I weary of thee, leman, nor ever shall." Blair paused, thoughtful. "Shall I be an ecdysiast for thee, then?"

Jim inspired sharply. Exhaling more slowly, he admitted, "'Twould pass the time pleasantly an thou didst." Tantalogagnia for each of them, then.

Blair kicked off his shoon, then, his body sliding into vermiculate patterns, began to languidly denude himself. His thorax appeared in increments -- a shifting muscle, a nipple, a tuft of hair, a curving rib. Prescinding, he pulled the shirt briefly back up to cover himself, then he retrorsed and dropped it entire, his naked back gleaming in the lamplight.

The lightsome man turned with a provocative smile to face Jim full on. Devilment in his eyen, Blair undulated, lifting stalwart arms above his crown to display every line of torso and limb. Ensorcelled, Jim could do no more than stare esuriently, aphonically entreating his beloved to continue.

"Fain would I make thee happy, leman," Blair murmured throatily. "Tell me. How shall I make thee happy?"

"Thou knowest," Jim gasped, freed once more to speak. "Carry on, beloved, I pray thee."

His riant face aglow, Blair recommenced, hands dropping to his waistband. Coqueting, he lingered there briefly, then relented, unfastening the button and sliding down the zipper. Lithely he weltered as he pushed his breeches down and off, taking his sokkes with them at the last.

Panting lightly, sphygmus hammering, Jim watched as Blair's dilitant linga was revealed, feeling his own membrum virile expand at the sight. The lissome, leesome body bared to his eyen was a neverending source of joy.

Naturalibus, Jim's swain approached him. "I would leifer not be alone in my nakedness. Wouldst join me?"

"An it please thee," Jim replied, trying for nonchalance and failing when his membrous copesmate's moschate scent reached his nosethirls, causing a frisson of prolepsis to run through him.

Blair bussed Jim tenderly, then began to strip him. Jim's shirt was first to vanish, followed by shoon, trews, smallclothes, and socks, Blair jaculating each piece into a corner as soon as it was free. The task took somewhat longer than it ought, though, as Blair osculated each bit of flesh as it was uncovered. Finally he returned to Jim's lips, beginning the cataglottism that they both so loved. Lightning sparked along Jim's nerves, from pate to hallux. He wrapped his arms around his lover and pulled him in tight, only to unmew him in puzzlement when Blair drew away.

"Th'art not quite ready," Blair murmured.

Jim, skimble-skamble, glanced down at his own nude form, then over at Blair's. "How so, beloved?"

Blair wordlessly reached out strong hands to cradle Jim's wrist, then carefully removed the horologe there. He glanced up through his eyelashes, smiling faintly, and deosculated the satin spot inside Jim's wrist where the leather band had levigated the skin. "So, beloved," Blair breathed. He released the wrist and walked away to place the watch on the gueridon where it would be safe, leaving Jim torn between the pleasure of pygophilous as he watched the treasured derriere move away, and the pain of being left solitary with nought but the air to soothe his flesh.

Both soon ended, though, as Blair turned back and ambled toward him, not stopping until he was pressed up against Jim, his hirsote belly making a welcome nest for the rigid peartree so clamantly seeking a warm haven. He presented the jar of glary ointment he'd picked up at the gueridon, smiling, then placed it in Jim's hand. Clutching it tightly, Jim threw his head back and stared at the calotte, tight-jawed, as sharp teeth bit lightly at one duddle and harder at the other. Lenifying the abused pap with a last labial caress, Blair hirsled straight downwards, licking and kissing a path along Jim's sternum as his own created a rougher path for Jim's tumescence to travel.

Unable to ofhold any longer, Jim whimpered and looked down when Blair stopped to play with his nave, first rimming it then swyving it with his tongue, then simply burying his nose in it as his tongue and teeth played with the skin beneath. The warm hands splayed across his hips held Jim firmly still, and Blair seemed oblivious of the lance jousting with his chin.

"Prithee, beloved," Jim impetrated, anguished delight coursing through him.

Blair looked up and chuckled wickedly. "Thou hadst but to ask, leman," he said, and turned his attention further down. Sericate hair slid along Jim's priapus, stimulating him almost beyond bearing. He whimpered again, and buried his free hand in the rubiginous mass to ease his torment.

Dropping finally to his knees, Blair tipped his head back and gazed up with loving eyen. "Th'art so comely," he said, allowing one finger to trace Jim's prolix prick. "And th'art mine." Before Jim could react, Blair leaned forward to swallow him, more and more until his nose was buried in the dark inguinal hair and his chin was brushing taut coilles. Jim desperately sorted out the galvanic sensations to keep himself from zoning, barely noticing Blair taking the jar of unguent from his hand.

A lubricious finger slid into Jim's anus as a skilled tongue and mouth worked his cock, and what of his mind still worked thanked God for putting Blair on the same earth at the same time. By the time the second coated digit had entered him, he was incapable of doing anything but cantillating Blair's name in mindless veneration.

Loss swept through him as fingers and mouth were withdrawn, and he mourned, his canticle becoming a keen of need.

Strong hands pushed and pulled and tugged him down and forward, giving him enough time for his mind to clear somewhat, and to realize what was next. On the floor in a brandreth, knees spread wide and head pillowed on his arms, Jim waited breathlessly for his lover's entry. Blair readied himself against Jim's fundament, then exserted firmly, and Jim's heart soared. 'He hath perced to the roote,' he thought in delight. In a mere trice, it seemed, he had adjusted to the heated girth, and his canticle began again in time with Blair's puissant thrusts.

The cadence built, with Jim fervently matching every move Blair made while Blair reached around to stroke Jim's cock to the same rhythm. Finally, it was too much. Ululating his joy, Jim clamped down on his lover's phallus, wringing a matching yowl from the man rogering him so skillfully. A small, tight thrust of Blair's hips, a clench of Blair's fingers, and the lovers soared into synorgasmia.

"I'faith, beloved, 'twas the best yet," Jim said when his breath had returned at long last. "Th'art a man of rare skill."

"And thee," Blair replied. With a final kisse to Jim's nape, he withdrew his demulscent priapus and slid to lie by Jim's side. "Certes, we shall never either of us suffer from aphallatosis!"

Silence fell as they made themselves more comfortable on the hard floor, tangling limbs in familiar fashion, until at last, with matching suspirations, the pair drifted off to sleep.




I'm glossing everything that's archaic or unusual, since not everyone on the list is a native speaker of English; if you already know some of the terms, just skip 'em. I've put the words in order of appearance; if you'd rather have an alphabetical list, let me know.


Glossary for notes and summary section:

myriad: countless

gramercy: thanks

fabliau: bawdy tale (usually in verse, but I'm just not that good...)

sans: without

avowtrye: sexual intercourse for fleshly delight


Glossary for story:

deupareunia: sexual act gratifying to both participants

jolif mestrier amourous: love's merry business (foreplay and sexual intercourse)

eyen: archaic plural for "eye"

callypygian: having shapely buttocks

glistering: sparkling brilliantly

seraphic: adoring

mine: archaic for "my" when the next word starts with a vowel

Adonis: an unusually handsome man

beguiled: charmed, diverted

blandishment: gentle flattery

aporetic: disbelieving, doubtful

didst not know?: didn't you know?

th'art: contraction for "thou art", meaning "you are"

apogee: highest point, culmination

tretis: well-proportioned and graceful

pulchritude: physical comeliness (attractiveness)

nay: no

'tis: contraction for "it is"

thou: you

art: are

eesome: pleasing to the eye

exoptable: extremely desirable

evancalous: pleasant to embrace

certes: certainly

prithee: short for "I pray thee", meaning "please"

thy: your (used when the next word starts with a consonant)

thewy: muscled, brawny

stayed his response: stopped his response, didn't let himself react

aficianado: fan

tantalolagnia: arousal caused by teasing

verecund: shy and bashful

ultramarine: deep blue

e'en: archaic for "even"

ne'er: archaic for "never"

thee: you

leman: sweetheart, lover

ecdysiast: stripper

inspired: inhaled

'twould: it would

an thou didst: if you did

shoon: archaic plural for shoe

vermiculate: sinuous

languidly: slowly, lazily

denude: strip

thorax: chest

prescinding: turning aside

retrorsed: turned backward

entire: completely

lightsome: graceful

devilment: mischief

undulated: swayed in place

stalwart: strong, muscular

crown: head

ensorcelled: spellbound

esuriently: hungrily

aphonically: silently

fain: willingly

thou knowest: you know

riant: smiling

recommenced: began again

coqueting: teasing

lithely: limberly, flexibly

weltered: writhed, wriggled

breeches: trousers (often knee-length)

sokkes: socks

sphygmus: pulse

dilitant: expanding

linga: penis

membrum virile: penis

lissome: graceful

leesome: lovable

naturalibus: naked

swain: boyfriend, lover

leifer: rather

wouldst: would you, will you

an it please thee: if you like, if you want

membrous: having a large "member", or penis

copesmate: partner in sexual intercourse

moschate: musky

nosethirls: nostrils

frisson: shiver

prolepsis: anticipation

bussed: kissed

trews: trousers

smallclothes: underwear

jaculating: throwing (weren't expecting that, were you? <g>)

osculated: kissed

cataglottism: tongue-kissing

pate: head

hallux: big toe

unmew: release

skimble-skamble: confused

horologe: a device used in telling time

gueridon: a small, round table

deosculate: kiss sweetly

levigated: smoothed

pygophilous: arousal by means of buttocks

derriere: buttocks

nought: nothing

hirsote: hairy

peartree: euphemism for penis

clamantly: urgently

glary: slippery

calotte: a vaulted ceiling (poetic license -- it is a loft, after all!)

duddle: nipple

lenifying: soothing

pap: nipple

labial: of the lips

hirsled: slid with grazing or friction

tumescence: swollen flesh; erection

ofhold: to hold back, withold or restrain

nave: archaic for "navel"

swyving: fucking

lance: penis

impetrated: beseeched, begged, asked

thou hadst but to ask: you only had to ask

sericate: silky

priapus: penis

rubiginous: brownish-red (poetic license again, okay? I know it's really dark brown...)

prolix: lengthy

inguinal: of the groin

coilles: testicles, balls

galvanic: stimulating

unguent: ointment

lubricious: slippery

cantillating: chanting

veneration: worship

canticle: chant

keen: wailing cry

brandreth: tripod

fundament: buttocks

exserted: thrust

hath perced to the roote: (line swiped from Chaucer) has pierced to the root

trice: moment, brief time

girth: size around

puissant: strong, robust

ululating: howling

phallus: penis

rogering: fucking (said only of the penetrator, not the penetratee)

synorgasmia: orgasm occuring simultaneously in both partners

i'faith: in faith, honestly, truly

'twas: it was

aphallatosis: mental disorder resulting from lack of a sex life

suspirations: sighs



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